MARRIAGE AROUND THE WORLD
The word “wed” is derived from the ancient Greek word for “pledge.” And that’s exactly what a wedding is, no matter what country it takes place in, no matter what culture it’s part of. To wed is to pledge your shelf to another. There are few acts we perform that are more pure or more beautiful than the act of marriage.
THE PLEDGE THAT LASTS A LIFETIME:
Marriage is the most solemn pledge we make in our lifetimes. Traditionally the wedding pledge is made in front of family and friends who take special pains to stand up and witness our pledge. The wedding pledge is to be true and faithful and loving to another human being. To wed is both the most basic of all human pledges, and at the same time the most sublime.
Marriage carries with it the most solemn of promises, but it also embodies the potential for the greatest joy of human existence – the pure joy that flows from two hearts beating as one. There are few joys in life as deep or as long lasting as the joy that springs from the well of true love and a lasting marriage.
IF WE ARE LUCKY, WE FIND OUR ONE, TRUE SOUL MATE:
We even have a term for it: soul mates. Two people, individual but at the same time inextricably a part of each other, so in-tune with the wants and the needs and the desires of the other that often words are not necessary. A mere glance between two lovers speaks volumes.
In almost all cultures the marriage ceremony ends with the bride and groom exchanging a kiss. The wedding kiss transcends cultures, it bridges tribes, it is one of the very few things that bind all of us together as human beings. From ancient times to the modern day, from the deepest jungles to the tallest skyscrapers, the wedding kiss symbolizes for all people everywhere the physical uniting of two souls.
MARRIAGE IS THE STRONGEST BOND THE WORLD HAS EVER KNOWN:
Marriage is a bringing together. It is a bringing together of two people, of two families, or two tribes, or two villages, or even two countries. Marriage is that powerful. Marriage is not something to be entered into lightly. Marriage is a pledge meant to last a lifetime.
Yet it is one of the unceasing marvels that we are able to express something as basic as love and marriage in so many wonderful and touching ways. Such is the wonder of human existence. The ceremonies and the traditions may be different, they may seem strange or outlandish or they may touch feelings in us that we never knew we had, but there is something about marriage that is instantly recognizable no matter what the language.
LOVE TRULY DOES MAKE THE WORLD GO AROUND:
It has often been said that love transcends everything, that it knows no barriers. Here you will find many ways to “tie the knot.” Perhaps you will discover a charming wedding tradition that you can make all your own. If you have decided to make the pledge, then be prepared to embrace love and marriage in all its splendors, and the world will be yours.
FILIPINO WEDDING:
At a Filipino wedding, both the bride and groom have money pinned to them as people dance with them at the reception. Sometimes the families compete to see who will collect more. The couple, to symbolize their undying love for each other, will release a pair of doves, that were caged in an elaborate bell made of flowers.
FRENCH WEDDING:
As the couple departs from the church, laurel leaves are scattered outside the exit. At the reception, the newlyweds toast using a special two-handled cup that has been passed down thru the generations. The cup is called the Coupe de marriage. After the wedding reception, some of the friends of the couple will "interrupt" their wedding-night by banging pots and pans and singing loudly outside their bedroom window. The groom is then supposed to invite the pranksters in for refreshments.
African WEDDING:
Jumping the broom is a custom that originated as the symbolic jumping the doorway, or threshold from a carefree single life into the responsibilities of domestic life and a future together. Tying the Knot means that the couple is actually bound together at the wrists during the ceremony, linking them together symbolically. The bride, as a symbol of modesty, will hide her face behind a veil of braided hair as an offer to the Gods to join in the celebration, wine is poured onto the ground.
AMERICAN INDIAN WEDDING:
The traditional colors woven into the brides dress point to the four corners of the earth, White for east, Blue for south, Yellow for west and Black for north. The bride and groom wash their hands to symbolically rid themselves of evil and loves from their past. To symbolize their bonding, the couple will share during their ceremony, a meal of corn mush ,made of both white and yellow corn. The white represents male and yellow female, joined together.
AMISH WEDDING:
The wedding ceremony of the Amish are plain and wonderfully simple. The bride and groom personally deliver to each guest an invitation to their bonding. The wedding is planned to be celebrated after the harvesting season, so all can attend, usually in the middle of the week. The ceremony is simple, as is the Bride's dress, which is new, but something ordinary that could be worn to church on Sunday.
ARABIC (MOSLEM) WEDDING:
Arabic Weddings vary depending on the country and religion of the bride and groom. Although Christian weddings in the Arab World bear clear similarities to Western Weddings, the Moslem weddings in the Arab countries are influenced by Moslem traditions. Moslem weddings (pre-arranged or not) start with a Shaikh and Al-Kitab (book) for the bride and groom. The groom may or may not see his bride until the wedding day. Men and women in wedding ceremonies and receptions are segregated affairs, with areas for both men and women. The women at the ceremony symbolically mourn the loss of the bride by doing the "wedding wail". The brides dress is a beautifully ornate Caftan, and the bride’s hands and feet are "bound" in intricate lace-like patterns painted using a henna dye.
CHINESE WEDDING:
The invitations sent to the guest are wrapped in red gift-wrap, as the traditional colors of happiness and wealth are red and gold. Any gifts of money to the newlyweds are presented in red envelopes for the same reason. Gold jewelry -filled purses are also presented to the bride by women relatives and close friends to portray her new status. During the ceremony both bride and groom pay homage and respect to their parents and elders for the guidance and wisdom they have bestowed upon them. After the ceremony, firecrackers are lit to chase any evil spirits and demons away from the couple. During the reception the bride will be presented in typically at least three different wedding outfits.
CUBAN WEDDING:
The reception at a Cuban wedding is alive with music and dancing .Each man that dances with the bride must pin money to her dress. All the guests bring presents, and these are displayed on a large table. The bride and groom also give a gift to each guest, thanking them for attending.
CZECH WEDDING:
Before the ceremony, the couple's wedding bed is "blessed" by laying an infant on the bed to enhance their fertility. On the steps of the church, the couple is presented and gets a "stern" lecture on their duties as husband and wife from their starosta , the couples male sponsor. The bridesmaids duties include pinning pieces of rosemary on each guest as another symbol of fertility. After the ceremony, the bride's veil is removed and is replaced by the traditional matron’s bonnet while the guests sing "Pisen Svatebni", the Czech wedding song.
DUTCH WEDDING:
To mark their engagement couples give one another gold bands which they wear on their left hands. At the ceremony, when the couple kneels, the groom may put his knee on the bride's hem as a sign that he plans to "keep her in line." The bride, in turn, may step on his foot as she rises, as a sign that she is reasserting herself. After a Dutch wedding, the couple plants lily-of-the-valley in their garden so that they can renew their love for one another every year when the plant blooms.
ENGLISH WEDDING:
The English wedding celebration begins on the way to the ceremony, as young girls scatter flower petals along the path the bride is walking, in hopes of providing a happy path in life. On one bent arm, the bride carries a horseshoe decorated with ribbons, to bestow on her good luck. The traditional wedding cake is a fruitcake, and the top tier is called the "christening cake", which is saved for the baptism of the couple first child. The cake is typically made of raisins, ground almonds and cherries and topped with special candies called marzipan.
INDU WEDDING : THE SEVEN STEPS:
After the couple has taken seven steps around the fire at their ceremony, their bond is sealed, and the following is recited in a ritual, Saptha Padhi. It also makes a beautiful reading on its own.
We have taken the seven steps. You have become mine forever.
Yes, we have become partners. I have become yours.
Hereafter I cannot live without you.
Do not live without me. Let us share the joys.
We are word and meaning, united. You are thought and I am sound.
May the nights be honey-sweet for us; may the mornings be honey-sweet for us;
may the earth be honey-sweet for us; may the heavens be honey-sweet for us.
May the plants be honey-sweet for us; may the sun be all honey for us;
may the cows yield us honey-sweet milk!
As the heavens are stable, as the earth is stable,
as the mountains are stable, as the whole universe is stable,
so may our union be permanently settled.
INDONESIAN WEDDING : HONEY CEREMONY:
Honey is a symbol of the sweetness in life. And so, with this dish of honey, we proclaim this day as a day of great joy and celebration-a day to remember-Your Day.
We thank you, Allah [or substitute deity name], for creating this divine substance, and ask you to bless it, even as you will bless this holy union. Amen.
[Groom dips his little finger into the honey and touches bride's tongue with it; bride does the same, touching groom's tongue.]
As together you now share this honey, so may you, under God's guidance, in perfect love and devotion to each other, share your lives together, and thereby may you find life's joys doubly gladdening, its bitterness sweetened, and all things hallowed by time, companionship and love.
AFRICAN-AMERICAN WEDDING - CROSSING STICKS:
Couples demonstrate their commitment by crossing tall wooden sticks in an African-American tradition that dates back to the time of slavery. The sticks represent the power and life force within trees. By crossing the sticks the couple expresses a wish for a strong and grounded beginning.
JUMPING THE BROOM (AFRICAN-AMERICAN):
The couple holds the broom together and sweeps in a circle while the officiant or families elder talk about the significance of the ritual. Then the broom is placed on the floor and the couple joins hands. Everyone counts to three-then you jump!
Dark and stormy may come the weather,
This man and woman are joined together.
Let none but him that makes the thunder,
Put this man and woman asunder.
I therefore announce you both the same,
Be good, go long, and keep up your name.
The broomstick's jumped, the world's not wide,
(JUMP)
She's now your own, go kiss your bride!
TASTING THE FOUR ELEMENTS (YORUBA):
In a ritual adapted from a Yoruba tradition, the bride and groom taste four flavours that represent different emotions within a relationship: sour (lemon), bitter (vinegar), hot (cayenne), and sweet (honey). By tasting each of the flavours, the couple symbolically demonstrates that they will be able to get through the hard times in life, and, in the end, enjoy the sweetness of their marriage.
MALA BADAL (BANGLADESH):
After the wedding feast, the ritual of Mala Badol is performed in Bangladesh and other South Asian countries. A thin cloth is placed over both the bride and the groom. They feed each other and share sips of borhani (a spicy yogurt drink) beneath the cloth. While looking at their reflection in a mirror, the bride and groom are asked,
What do you see?
They each answer with a romantic declaration, such as:
I see the rest of my life.
The couple then exchanges garlands of flowers.
BREAKING THE GLASS (JEWISH):
Crushing a wineglass under the groom's foot at the end of the ceremony is a Jewish tradition with many meanings. It's a symbol of the destruction of the First Temple in Jerusalem; a representation of the fragility of relationships; and a reminder that marriage changes the lives of individuals forever. Or, interpret it this way: Drinking the wine represents the joys and sweetness of life, and crushing the glass represents the hardships.
P'YE-BAEK (KOREA):
The bride offers dates and chestnuts-symbols of children-to the groom's parents while sitting at a low table covered with other symbolic offerings. The parents offer sake in return, and as a final gesture they throw the dates and chestnuts at the bride, who tries to catch them in her large wedding skirt. Each catch is symbolic of a child. Family members may also offer gifts of money in white envelopes to the bride.
HONEY AND WALNUTS (GREECE):
In some of the Greek islands, the wedding ceremony ends with honey and walnuts offered to the bride and groom from silver spoons. Walnuts are chosen because they break into four parts, symbolizing the bride, the groom, and their two families.
HAITIAN WEDDING:
Wedding Guests according to custom bring gifts to the wedding, but not gifts of money. The wedding cake is not cut at the reception party, but later at the couple’s home. Food at the reception would include conch, a type of shellfish, fried pork, and black rice, Creole style.
INDIAN WEDDING:
A wedding in India could be a 3 day celebration. Uninvited guests flood the bride or groom's parents house to participate in the celebrations. The Indian bride, after a ceremonial cleansing, is painted with henna patterns on her hands and feet. After the ceremony, the brothers of the groom toss flower petals to ward off evil from the Newlyweds.
LATIN AMERICAN WEDDING:
The Flower girl and Ring bearer are dressed as miniature versions of the bride and groom. The Father of the bride holds a dish, filled with coins and then covered, that symbolizes the brides dowry.
MEXICAN WEDDING:
The bride and groom are blessed at home by their parents before the ceremony. The groom presents to his bride thirteen gold coins as his promise to support here. The arras, a small chest of coins symbolizing wealth and strength, is blessed during their ceremony. The Padrinos, or godparents, also are honoured by being part of the wedding.
PUERTO RICAN WEDDING:
In the Aras, the priest blesses a plate of coins during the ceremony, and gives them to the groom. He in turn gives the coins to the bride, who shall keep them along with other mementos of their wedding day. These are kept to ensure the couple good fortune and prosperity throughout their marriage. At the reception, all the gentleman the bride dances with pin money to her gown. Special pins, called capias, are displayed on a doll dressed like the bride. The capias has the bride and grooms names and the wedding date inscribed on them, and is given as favors to the guests.
LITHUANIAN WEDDING:
The couple, at their reception, are given the "elements of life", bread and salt, so as never to hunger, wine and honey for everything good in their life together.
POLISH WEDDING:
The brides traditional maidenly braids are undone by her bridesmaids in a custom called Rospleciny On the way to church, the couples way is blocked by children that the best man must pay "toll" to. At the reception the bride and groom are met by their parents, who give them the gifts of bread and salt, which represent the prosperity and the bitterness they shall meet in life. Guests give the bride money, and in return she gives them small gifts.
RUSSIAN WEDDING:
On her wedding day, the bride asks her parents for forgiveness for any offenses she may have caused. Her parents present the bride with bread and salt, in the hopes that she will never want for food. At the reception, champagne glasses are thrown to the floor after the couple is toasted, if the glasses break, they shall have happiness in their marriage. To show their preferences of their first child, the newlyweds tie to the front of their wedding car a doll for a girl and a bear if they would like a boy.
SCANDINAVIAN WEDDING:
On the way to church, the wedding procession includes violinists and trumpeters. The bride wears a Vasa jewelled crown to represent her purity. As birch branches adorn the church and altar, the bride and groom are hidden by "care cloths" during the final blessings in church to keep them away from evil influences.
SCOTTISH WEDDING:
The groom wears the kilt of his "Clan", and bagpipe music is played at the entrance and recessional of the bridal party.
VIETNAMESE WEDDING:
The groom leads a procession to the bride’s house, accumulating family and friends along the way. When they arrive, they present the bride with gifts of clothes, jewellery and currency. The groom's mother is the only one that does not join the procession, to show the bride there is no rivalry between them.
EGYPTIAN WEDDING:
Egyptian women pinch the bride on her wedding day for good luck. The bride's family traditionally does all the cooking for a week after the wedding, so the newlywed couple can relax.
FIDJI WEDDING:
The groom ceremoniously presents the bride's father with a tabua (whale's tooth) as a symbol of status and wealth.
FINLAND WEDDING:
Brides wear golden crowns. After the wedding, the single guests form a circle and dance around the bride, who is blindfolded. They wait for her to place her crown on one of their heads, because tradition holds that whomever she crowns will be the next to wed. The bride and groom are given seats of honour at the reception There the bride holds a sieve, covered with a silk shawl. Guests come by to slip money into the sieve. Their names and the amounts of their gifts are announced publicly by a groomsman. Traditionally, Finnish brides are accompanied by an older married man who represents long marriage. They go door-to-door collecting gifts in a pillowcase.
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